A couple of weeks ago I was home with my cousin, we were talking about life-changing decisions that someone we knew very well had taken. Very few were pleased that it became a subject of long discussions. I sat and heard his point of view as well as what he thought would have been a better alternative, which was quite reasonable. I went on and asked him, “ If you were in her shoes, if you had her past, if you were given the same entourage, if you had lost what she’s lost, if you’d been through what she’s been through, if you could feel what she could feel, etc. Do you truly believe you would have done anything different than what she’s doing now?”
In her book ‘A return to love’ Marianne Williamson wrote:
It can be very hard to let go of your perception of someone’s guilt when you know that by every standard of ethics, morality, or integrity, you’re right to find fault with them…If you’re judging a brother, you’re wrong even if you’re right…But God doesn’t need us to police the universe. Shaking your finger at someone doesn’t help them change. If anything, our perception of someone’s guilt only keeps them stuck in it…Treating someone with compassion and forgiveness is much more likely to elicit a healed response.
If me and you can both admit of not being capable of taking advice from strangers about our lives, then surely we can understand why someone is less likely to accept our advice unless they feel loved or better yet understood. It is critical to understand the path that has brought someone where they are before asking to lead them in any way.
If I were to be a prostitute and perhaps it was due to a lack of finances, childhood abuse, rejection from family and so much more, unless you could understand all the above you would just ask me to quit and find a job and maybe that didn’t end up well in the past; a lack of information invites a lack of communication.
Let’s pretend this time you had found me in the streets and brought me food, complimented me, and over time loved me, I would feel secure enough to open up. Through the love that you would have given me, I would find enough courage to value myself above my circumstances and hence make a decision to better my life.
As Sarah Jakes Roberts wrote in her book ‘Lost and Found’:
“We’re all one heartbreak away from bitterness, one bad decision away from calamity.”
No one is perfect for sure, some are just closer than others to perfection. Your choice to judge, gossip, and hate on someone will not win you prize nor title. When you chose to pour love into the world and embrace all people from all walks of life, you already have won at heart.
Now tell me,
Will you love them back to life?
4 thoughts on “Will you love them back to life?”
I completely agree with all that’s been said, one question though… a philosopher said,”Love is more conducive for human happiness than hate is, that being said, it’s astonishing how eagerly men flee from happiness”, this of course asserting that people often choose hate… We all agree on the prospects of love. But the problem is our depravity.
How do we overcome the human condition?
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To me it’s more like a trick. We like instant gratification and usually act on the present without thinking about just how far our actions can affect our future. What looks easy may not necessarily be easy. For example, if I have $200 now, I can spend it either on a nice handbag or I can wait on later and let it flourish and grow into more. When we hate, it’s instant we get that bag, we are happy “now”, someone else is suffering because we are denying them our love. We think it is a burden on the other person only. Once you initiate the hate, you keep going and it is weary. In the long run hate is not the easy option. On the other hand, if you chose love then it seems hard in the beginning especially when you feel there isn’t much to love. As time goes, love will open up doors of truths we hadn’t known. In the blog say it is learning about the past and finding about the beauty in the ashes really. This process may seem like the harder when but in truth it is always easier to love than hate just like it is easier to tell the truth than lie. I hope that answered your question David. 🙂
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Thank you love ❤